Scottish first aid

A woman sitting in a restaurant suddenly began to cough.

After a few seconds it became apparent that she was in real distress.

Two locals, MacKenzie and Donald sitting at the next table turned to look at her.

Kin ya swalla ? Asked MacKenzie.

The woman signalled 'No!' , desperately shaking her head.

Kin ya breath ? Asked MacDonald.

The woman shook her head NO !!!

With that, MacKenzie walked behind her, lifted up the back of her dress, yanked down her knickers and ran his tongue up and down the crack of her backside.

This shocked the woman into such a violent spasm, that the obstruction flew out of her mouth
and she began to breath again.

MacKenzie swaggered back to his table and took a deep swig of his beer.

Donald said in admiration, "Ya know MacKenzie, I'd heard of that bloody 'Hind Lick Manoeuvre',
but that's the first time I ever seen somebody do it".